Pageant Minute: Miss World 2012--World Fashion Designer Award Competition--The "Oh Dear"!!!

Beauty Pageant Evening Gown "Oh Dear"!

Where Is Miss Mongolia On This List? Keep Reading...

If you're an avid pageant-watcher (and if you are reading this, you probably are), you know that the 62nd Annual Miss World contest is happening in Ordos Inner Mongolia China and the Final Live Telecast will take place in a couple of weeks on August 18th.

Well kids, it's here--my Nick "Oh Dear, What was SHE Thinking?" List of Gowns from last week's Miss World 2012 "World Fashion Designer Award Competition. In the last post here on my little ol' blog, I talked about some of my favorites in the bunch. So, now...let's get to the CHA CHA, too-high SLITS, Is-This-a-National-Costume-or-an-Evening Gown?, "Big Bird" inspired Feathered MESSES:

Cha Cha Queens:

Miss Costa Rica Silvana Sanchez: No, no and NO! (I think that is UNIVERSAL in every language). I want to put a big banana-and-pineaple Carmen Miranda turban atop her head to just finish this ensemble off. That's what she is missing. Score: 4.5 (out of 10 in case you are wondering)

Miss Bosnia and Herzegovina Fikreta Husic: Havana Cuba, here I come!! Or is it Rio?? Remove those tacky hem-piped ruffles on that over-the-shoulder capelet and change those 1988 pumps, and then, maybe then, we can discuss...Score: 5.0

Miss Serbia Bojana Lecic: OK, first off: she's GORGEOUS. But this gown. Who. Puts. WIRING on the hem of a ruffled high-low gown like this? She's not a Circus Clown from Cirque du Soleil! And then, what is hanging off her shoulder? It's called EDIT! How do you say "Poor Thang" in Serbian? Score: 4.9

Miss Bulgaria Gabriela Vasileva: Little PEACH Bo Peep Stripper Fab. That's what I would call this dress. Last year's Miss World, Ivian Sarcos of Venezuela, won in something that was (somewhat) similar to this, so she probably felt "Hey, I want something like this" and told her designer to create it. Bad idea. The oversized earrings and stripper platform heels did not help. Score: 5.5

The HOOCHIE Awards Go To:

Paris and Snookie: Miss Kazakhstan and Miss Belgium

First, let's begin with Miss Kazakhstan Evgeniya Kleshina (left pic above). This red lace and feathered mermaid-style gown with silver bust cups is a HOOCHIE fab. It's NOT the Las Vegas AVN Porn Awards huney, it's MISS WORLD! Those platform heels SLAY me. So tacky. Score: 4.5

Miss Belgium Laura Beyne: I'm sure Laura is a sweet girl but why did she think Snookie from Jersey Shore was an Evening Gown Muse?  I cannot say more. Score: 4.9

She Didn't Even Try Award Miss Slovakia Kristina Krajcirova: Poly-satin strapless gathered gown with badly-constructed rippling hem.This is a gown one would see at a prom-and-bridal shop, for 75% off. Score: 4.5

  

Too Muchey Award Miss Honduras Jennifer Valle: Let's just throw everything AND the kitchen sink...into a gown. Can you just imagine if this ended up on the Project Runway catwalk in front of Michael Kors and Nina Garcia? Or on an award show red carpet? Plain and simple, it's CHONCHEE! (Latino for TACKY!). Score: 4.9

Feathered Messes:

Guadeloupe and El Salvador

Miss Guadeloupe Brigitte Golabkhan (left): is so beautiful I can't even breathe. However, she chooses to wear this black and magenta satin and feathered concoction of a gown to the Miss World "World Fashion Designer Award" Competition last week, and well, her beauty stock for me, just went down. Score: 5.2

Miss El Salvador Maria Luisa Vicuna (right): Too much lace, too many feathers, and then the mermaid shape. She was trying for a Beyonce-at-the-Met and well, she achieved a gown in a San Salvador Drag Show. Score: 5.0

The Bahamas and Ukraine

Miss Bahamas Daronique Young (left): I give her points for the "I'm a Mermaid Princess" look. She does look kinda HOT in this two piece ensemble. But, isn't this more of a costume than an evening gown? How many peacocks did it take to make this gown? Score: 6.0

Miss Ukraine Karina Zhyronkina (right): Let me begin by saying that she is STUNNING! She should either win Miss World 2012 or at least be on the Final podium (it's like the Pageant Olympics!). But this gown. There's something both beautiful (the sequin detail looks expensive and I like the black and blue color combination) but...the feather applique and side cut-outs on the torso, it all adds to a dress one would see atop a Gay Pride float. Score: 7.0

Rosette Queens: Indonesia and Uganda

Miss Indonesia Ines Putri Tjiptadi Chandra: If this gown was placed in front of Michael Kors on Project Runway, he'd say she looked like she was POOPING feathered rosettes. Score: 4.8

Miss Uganda Phiona Bissu:  Awww, bless her little heart. Miss Uganda's gown reminds me of those dresses that are made entirely of toilet paper... I really wish there was something more I could say. Score: 4.5

National Costume Awards:

Miss Kenya Shamim Nabil: OK, maybe I am confused. I know that the Miss World "World Fashion Designer Award" is about highlighting the fashion design talent of the contestant's nations. So...is this also the National Parade of Nations Costume Parade? Can it be too redundant for a "Miss Kenya" to be wearing animal print safari as an evening gown? I think even the safari tourists would run away from this. Score: 5.0

Miss Cote d'Ivoire Helene-Valerie Djouka: Because she looks so darn cute, I am giving her points. Otherwise, on any one else, this still would be a pseudo-costume mess of an orange dress. And is that an iridescent poly organza overlay?? NOOOO!!!! Score: 6.4

And My Favorite of the Group:

Miss Mongolia Bayaarma Huselbaatar: I don't even know where to begin with this one. But I'll try. Bayaarma gets MAJAH "Nick Points" in the "Bringing Out Your Inner Drag Queen" part of working a runway catwalk. This gown/costume is rather FAB in a kooky way. The headdress is very John Galliano for Dior "Tutankhamen" Collection from back in the day.  
For ALL of this, I give her my Score of 8.0. It's a MESS but a mess that makes a gay man smile.

Beauty Pageant Minute: The new Miss France 2012--and those BIG Ball Gowns!

Miss Scarlett O'Hara of France Is...

Delphine Wespiser, "Miss Alsace" was crowned "Miss France 2012" and will compete in the 2012 edition of Miss Universe

This past Saturday, France crowned its 65th beauty queen. She represented Alsace, the fifth-smallest of the 27 regions of France, on the Eastern border, adjacent to Germany and Switzerland. Her name is Delphine Wespiser, she's a red-haired, 19 year-old management student and is 1.75 meters (5' 9"). The new "Miss France" was crowned at a televised show (shown on TF1) and held at the Penfeld Parc des Expositions in Brest.

Who Me? Delphine Wespiser, "Miss Alsace" reacts as her name is called out as "Miss France 2012"

She was crowned by last year's winner, the lovely Laury Thilleman--who was a favorite at "Miss Universe 2011" but didn't make the semi-finalist cut. Delphine's first and second runner-up of the event were Miss Pays de Loire, Mathilde Couly, and Miss Reunion, Marie Payet, respectively.

The Miss France pageant is an annual beauty pageant whose competitors are regional winners of local contests in Metropolitan France as well as its overseas territories like Reunion (Indian Ocean, near Africa) Guyane (South America), Martinique (Caribbean), Tahiti (South Pacific/Oceania) and so on. Last year there was a big brouhaha because it was the first year the "Miss France DIVA Doyenne", Genevieve de Fontenay was not director of the pageant and she, held her own separate "Miss France" contest.

A Kiss from Alain: French actor Alain Delon gives a congratulatory kiss to the new "Miss France", Delphine Wespiser

This year's pageant was hosted by Jean-Pierre Foucault and the General Director of the Miss France, "Miss France 2002" Sylvie Tellier. Actor--and French GOD--Alain Delon--was also on hand to crown the winner, Delphine. Speaking of the winner...

Swimsuit Delphine: Here is the new "Miss France" during the Swimsuit Competition on Saturday night. The Lycra stretch one-piece gold swimsuits featured lots of crystals, illusion front neckline panels and a multi-tiered tulle overskirt. I almost thought I was looking at photos from an ISU Grand Prix Ice Dancing Competition! I really hope they were playing Barry Manilow's "Copacabana" while they did their swimsuit runway strut! These swimsuits were extra fabulous for sure.

Mini Scarlett: "Miss Alsace" Delphine Wespiser (and future "Miss France") during the "Scarlett O'Hara"-themed portion of the night's televised pageant (don't ask, it's the French!).

Now, lets discuss the Quinceañera-like gowns the finalist wore. Please.

Sylvie Tellier (on the left) is thinking "Thank Dieu I am NOT wearing THAT!"

What Does This:


Have to do with this:

Scarlett O'Hara Queens: The Top Two, "Miss Pays de Loire" (left) and "Miss Alsace" (right) as "Miss France 2012" is about to be announced

The evening gowns of the finalists for "Miss France" is for some reason a BALL GOWN affair. It has been like this for several years now (maybe it's a crowning/finalist tradition for them). I just don't get it. For a country so synonymous with FASHION and Haute Couture and STYLE, for that matter, why oh why, do their beauty pageant girls wear these over-the-top, tacky-licious, "Princess"/top-of-a-wedding cake gowns? There is a complete disconnect. Seriously, take a look at the photo above: they are wearing THE SAME big tacky gown...But different color ways!

There must be a gown sponsor who provides these dresses (and therefore they have to wear them). Or maybe it is a "Princess Sissi" (above) or Scarlett O'Hara gown theme for all the finalists. But imagine if someone like Fashion Designer extraordinaire Alber Elbaz was asked to create his interpretation of those gowns? That, I would see.

Don't Cry...you don't have to wear that gown ever again!

Oh well, maybe next year, the organization will change it's Quinceañera ways and get with the 2012 program and have the girls wear some GORGEOUS Stephane Rolland Haute Couture gowns! Anything but those polyester iridescent organza "Toddlers & Tiaras" styles would be a good change. Something tells me that Delphine won't be wearing that (above) at the 2012 Miss Universe pageant--as long as MY French Gays get to her!

Click Below for the Crowning Moment of "Miss France 2012":

Project Runway Season 9 Recaps: My myLifetime.com Recap for Episode 8-- "Double D Drama"!!!

First Things First, Project Runway Season 9 Designer Olivier "Madonna Accent" Green Doesn't Like Big Boobies or...

"Bigger Boys": Men who are not Man-o-Rexic (like the one seen above--"thicker" Vivienne Westwood model (and bodyguard) Sergio Lo Re)

Oh poor skinny Olivier. Last night on Project Runway Season 9, the kids (and Bert!) had to work with CLIENTS. At first, they thought it would be MEN--as the episode began with Heidi bringing in nine men of varying sizes, onto the runway stage. This is were the GASPS of "Oh No Child, I ain't working with the 'Fatties' " came out of Olivier's lips. Soon, though, it turned out that the designers were creating looks for the men's girlfriends/wives. And here again, Miss Olivier was having issues not knowing what a Double D meant, because that was his client's bra size. Oh Bless His Heart! As I say in my Recap (beginning at the end of this POST), he has BPB, Body Prejudicial Behavior , and it needs to stop.

Malin Akerman, actress...NIKOLAKI runway Model???

Actress and Project Runway Judge Malin Akerman (above center) and Model Malin Akerman (left and right images) at NIKOLAKI Fall 2003 Runway Show

Yes, kids, last night's "Guest Judge" was the beautiful actress Malin Akerman, who back when David and I debuted our NIKOLAKI Fall 2003 Collection 8 years ago at Los Angeles Smashbox Fashion Week, was one of our runway models!! And did a fantastic job, I may add!

Now, Let's Get To The Fashions:

This simple black dress--straight out of Ann Taylor or Nordstrom--WON. It was "Mean Girls" Joshua McKinley's design. It was made well and fit his client to a "T".

It was a very simple design--consisting of a CIRCLE SKIRT and a Princess-seamed bodice--but he was praised for it. Whereas his fellow designer Bert Keeder--who also did a simple sellable design--was not, and in fact ended in the bottom. I don't get it. OK, so he added the wide Horsehair trim at the hem, but...that's not so original, take a look:

John Galliano for Christian Dior Haute Couture Fall 2008

My Favorite was:

Viktor Luna's colorful, quirky, stylish look. I still do not know how he did not win. It was fashion-forward, extremely well made, and styled so right that it looked as if it BELONGED to her!!!

Another design that ended in the Top was Anya Ayoung Chee's one shoulder printed high-low gown/dress with a modified "kimono" sleeve. The judges LOOOVED it! It was as if it was the "Next Coming of Fashion Christ!". Not so much in my eyes. I know the client liked it but I was surprised it garnered such praise from the judges. Now, what I could imagine is...

If she was a Miss Universe contestant touring the nightclubs in São Paulo, then yes, totally, this is HER DRESS! It was very Beauty Pageant "Evening Gown Competition, the What Not To Wear" edition (see gowns above).

Kimberly Goldson's design for her client was um, TIGHT. As in fit. Kimberly seems to love doing those too-tight mini's. It's "her thang" I guess. I just don't know if a mini was the right choice for her client. But I did like the top's draping. Interestingly enough, she seemed to have been doing a completely DIFFERENT dress when she first began working in the Parsons Workroom:

I kinda like the one above better.

Now, back to Body Prejudicial Behavior Olivier: His outfit was a MESS and looked A LOT like what he always does! Somehow he ended up safe and in the "Middle". He should have been in the bottom with this badly-fitting pants ensemble. That too-tight one-shoulder top is SO NOT for a 40-something year-old woman who has Double D breasteses. She looks like one of those "Real Housewives of Orange County" sans the tan. Let me bring up "Old Man" Bert again: What he created was well constructed and flattered his client but he was penalized for basically doing the same thing week after week. In my eyes Olivier made a poorly constructed garment AND does the SAME THING week after week! The judges seem to "pick & chose" but we all knew that...

But the Worst Was:

Pepto Bismol Cocktail: Contestant Bryce Black created this pink sheath dress with too-low stylized outside pocket, straight out of my Helen Joseph-Armstrong "Patternmaking for Fashion Design" textbook from FIDM. The seams were all puckering and it looked very amateur. Another casualty of a person whom I feel was too young and not ready to be on Project Runway. Bryce was barely out of school for goodness sakes! Get some training, some years under your design belt and then do the show...He gives new meaning to the phrase "Not ready for Primetime"!!

And now...Here's My "Nick V" myLifetime.com blog for this week's Episode:

"DOUBLE D DRAMA"

Last night was the 8th episode of "Project Runway" Season 9. And Bryce was OUT …Yes, I just told you how it ends. Why? Because the editors ruined it for me too: The episode was barely 30 seconds in when Bryce laments that he’s never won a challenge — and in fact, has been at the bottom several times —and is wondering if he's the “Weakest Link.” Um, Ya Think So??? I immediately exclaimed (in my loud voice), “He's GONE!!” (Thanks, Editors). Oh, and did I mention Joshua won? Yep. Sorry to ruin that for you, but right as the nails were being pounded into Bryce’s "Project Runway" coffin, “Orange-ua Joshua” was stating how he was in a “Much better place today” ... Seriously, RIGHT AFTER Bryce. Thanks, Editors, Part Deux.

Body Prejudicial
Now that I got that out of the way, let’s talk about the rest of the episode. The nine remaining designers (can we just get to the Top 5 PLEASE???) are sitting there as Miss Heidi Klum brings in what they think involves their next Challenge: nine men. Immediately, the Gay Claws start coming out as several of the designers don't want to pick “the Fatties” (Yes, I am talking to you, Madonna British Accent Olivier!). Jeeeesus! Now even the men have to deal with what women have been dealing with for AGES from these “kooky” Fashion Designers; it’s a syndrome I call BPB, short for Body Prejudicial Behavior, and this group has it in spades...

Click HERE to read the rest of my Recap--and be sure to leave me your Comments!! I read ALL of them!!!! (of course!!!)

Pageant Minute: Miss Universe 2011--Preliminary Evening Gowns--The "Oh No You Didn't!" Group!!!

A Universal HOT MESS...

Well, with "The Good" and "The Transparent" , must also come the "Hot Messes", or as I like to say the "Oh No She Didn't" Group. As you know, it's Miss Universe Time!!! The Final Miss Universe 2011 Telecast is TONIGHT--LIVE from the Brazilian MEGAcity São Paulo and in my last two posts I have given my "Nick V" Reviews on my Top Picks as well as the Transparent/Over-Embroidered Trend from seeing the photos and video of last Thursday night's Miss Universe Preliminary Competition.
All right kids, I hate to do this...but here are the Girls Who Should Have Known Better--Evening Gown-wise--I will Section them off by Continental Regions. Let's begin with...

Europe:

Miss Belgium Universe 2011 Justine De Jonckheere: Oh Lordy! She wore this same tacky-licious gown for the "Official Evening Gown Portraits" and ended up in my "Hot Mess" List then. Why would she wear this gown again is beyond me. It looks like a First Semester Fashion School Class Project.

For some reason, Europe had A LOT of messes. What is up with that? Are they having a lack of evening gown designers? Why is the European "Taste Level" for choosing and wearing Evening Gowns--when it comes to Beauty Pageants--just a little bit left of "What Is She Thinking?" After watching so many of these international beauty pageants, I am used to seeing a lot of those "Kooky" Eastern European girls choose gowns that look as if they were made in a one-bedroom apartment with little electricity...but for some reason, this year, this "Kooky" trend has spread throughout the continent--from East to West.

Miss Russia Universe 2011 Natalia Gantimurova: Here's the good part: I love the bustier/top portion and how it's draped; very Dior Haute Couture. But then it all goes Bad Prom Quinceañera from the waist down. It's just such a mess, I don't even know where to begin, other than taking that whole bottom gown section off and replacing it with a clean, fitted section. The garish colors of BLOOD red and muted olive did not help her either.

Miss Spain Universe 2011 Paula Guillo: Oh HUNEY! What is this dress? It's a strapless short mini but...with an iridescent chiffon over-lay being held up by a piece of embroidered applique'. I DO NOT get it. She's such a pretty girl. Why she wanted to look like a "Real Housewives of (fill in the blank)" at a tacky wedding in Atlantic City, is beyond me. No Señorita. Think of what Crown Princess Letizia would have worn...now go change!

Miss Kazakhstan Universe 2011 Valeriya Aleinikova: Yes, I know the Big/Strong Shoulders Trend is very NOW, but not in this manner. While the bias-cut slinky gown portion does flatter her figure, those inset Leg-o-Mutton sleeves, DO NOT. One thing's for sure, "Dynasty" Designer Nolan Miller as well as actresses Joan Collins and Linda Evans...they would be proud!

Miss Portugal Universe 2011 Laura Goncalves: Laura is such a pretty girl. She should have chosen a simpler, more elegant gown. Because this one, just didn't work for me--or for her! The top portion is fine with its criss-cross draped ruching, but then the bottom portion!? WHAT. Is. That. Fabric? And WHY is it on her? It looks like a throw-rug from Walmart's bathroom towels-and-mats section.

Miss Romania Universe 2011 Larisa Popa: Well, well, well, what have we got here? When she came out in this gown, the first thing I noticed was the bright bubblegum pink and apple-green fabrication, and I exclaimed an "All righty then!" Besides the over-abundance of Candy Colors, this one shoulder A-line shaped gown makes her look like a Bridesmaid from 1984 who is heading straight to the Open Bar!

Miss Hungary Universe 2011 Betta Lipcsei: OK, here's another example of the top portion being OK but then it went to Nuclear Wrinkled Taffeta Explosion! How, in the name of the Pageant Gods, did she think--as it was "presented to her" as THE gown she would wear to the Miss Universe Pageant--that this is even cute, elegant and worthy of having a crown being put on her head. It's so big at the bottom, she could hide ten Hungarian 4 year old's under there!

Miss Greece Universe 2011 Iliana Papageorgiou: Iliana is on a lot of pageant-watchers "Favorites" List as a possible contender for tonight's crown. But, not in this gown! It is a cheap polyester satin mess! And are those organza rosettes framing the high-low hem of the gown? No!!! And oh, should I even begin to discuss the turquoise blue pumps? OK, I will. They are FABULOUS! I give her that. And they're perfect when worn with a sexy Herve Leger--or NIKOLAKI mini dress (wink wink!), but NOT, EVER...with this gown.

South America:

Miss Guyana Universe 2011 Kara Lord: OK, this gown is perplexing. She's a Mermaid, I think. There are also design suggestions in this gown of that famous Boticelli painting "The Birth of Venus" (the seashell-looking bust sections, the flora-and-fauna sequined skirt). But then what's in the back? Is she "pooping" (sorry but I had to!), iridescent organza? WHY????? Maybe this is considered an evening gown trend in Guyana but not anywhere else I've been to!

North and Central America:

Miss Canada Universe 2011 Chelsae Durocher: Now, we're onto the "North American Fashion Victims" beginning with Canada. I love the Mermaid shape, but there's something about the fabric and that shoulder-exposing sleeve detail that makes it look cheap, dated and almost home-made. And really, was there a need to place a swirly applique' RIGHT ON HER BUST???!!!

Miss Guatemala 2011 Alejandra Barillas: Oh, Alejandra! At least you are consistent. She wore a mess of a gown for the "Official Evening Gown Portraits" and here she goes again, but this time a different mess of a gown! She's "on trend" with the Transparency thing as well as the strong shoulders, yet the overall effect makes her look like a 50-something year-old wife of a Mobster at a New Jersey Wedding. The side cut-outs, the too-short front, the tacky stretch lace at the THIGH and lower arms...Pobrecita, is what my abuelita would have said!

Miss Costa Rica 2011 Johanna Solano: Finally, last but not least in my "Miss Universe 2011 Hall of Shame Evening Gowns" was this one from the very pretty Johanna, Miss Costa Rica. Is she doing Bizet's "Carmen" in San Jose? The tiered ruffles on the gown are falling FLAT and look like the window drapes of an old lady's house; the rosettes on the torso/bustier are so "Happy Hands at Home"; the middle parted-yet-poufed in the back hairstyle is so 1992 Prom Photo. I wonder if these girls are forced to wear these things or they actually pick them and therefore (I am so scared) have no taste when it comes to wearing gowns...Maybe next time Miss Costa Rica. I know you can make me proud...