Pageant Minute: Miss World 2012--World Fashion Designer Award Competition--The "Oh Dear"!!!

Beauty Pageant Evening Gown "Oh Dear"!

Where Is Miss Mongolia On This List? Keep Reading...

If you're an avid pageant-watcher (and if you are reading this, you probably are), you know that the 62nd Annual Miss World contest is happening in Ordos Inner Mongolia China and the Final Live Telecast will take place in a couple of weeks on August 18th.

Well kids, it's here--my Nick "Oh Dear, What was SHE Thinking?" List of Gowns from last week's Miss World 2012 "World Fashion Designer Award Competition. In the last post here on my little ol' blog, I talked about some of my favorites in the bunch. So, now...let's get to the CHA CHA, too-high SLITS, Is-This-a-National-Costume-or-an-Evening Gown?, "Big Bird" inspired Feathered MESSES:

Cha Cha Queens:

Miss Costa Rica Silvana Sanchez: No, no and NO! (I think that is UNIVERSAL in every language). I want to put a big banana-and-pineaple Carmen Miranda turban atop her head to just finish this ensemble off. That's what she is missing. Score: 4.5 (out of 10 in case you are wondering)

Miss Bosnia and Herzegovina Fikreta Husic: Havana Cuba, here I come!! Or is it Rio?? Remove those tacky hem-piped ruffles on that over-the-shoulder capelet and change those 1988 pumps, and then, maybe then, we can discuss...Score: 5.0

Miss Serbia Bojana Lecic: OK, first off: she's GORGEOUS. But this gown. Who. Puts. WIRING on the hem of a ruffled high-low gown like this? She's not a Circus Clown from Cirque du Soleil! And then, what is hanging off her shoulder? It's called EDIT! How do you say "Poor Thang" in Serbian? Score: 4.9

Miss Bulgaria Gabriela Vasileva: Little PEACH Bo Peep Stripper Fab. That's what I would call this dress. Last year's Miss World, Ivian Sarcos of Venezuela, won in something that was (somewhat) similar to this, so she probably felt "Hey, I want something like this" and told her designer to create it. Bad idea. The oversized earrings and stripper platform heels did not help. Score: 5.5

The HOOCHIE Awards Go To:

Paris and Snookie: Miss Kazakhstan and Miss Belgium

First, let's begin with Miss Kazakhstan Evgeniya Kleshina (left pic above). This red lace and feathered mermaid-style gown with silver bust cups is a HOOCHIE fab. It's NOT the Las Vegas AVN Porn Awards huney, it's MISS WORLD! Those platform heels SLAY me. So tacky. Score: 4.5

Miss Belgium Laura Beyne: I'm sure Laura is a sweet girl but why did she think Snookie from Jersey Shore was an Evening Gown Muse?  I cannot say more. Score: 4.9

She Didn't Even Try Award Miss Slovakia Kristina Krajcirova: Poly-satin strapless gathered gown with badly-constructed rippling hem.This is a gown one would see at a prom-and-bridal shop, for 75% off. Score: 4.5

  

Too Muchey Award Miss Honduras Jennifer Valle: Let's just throw everything AND the kitchen sink...into a gown. Can you just imagine if this ended up on the Project Runway catwalk in front of Michael Kors and Nina Garcia? Or on an award show red carpet? Plain and simple, it's CHONCHEE! (Latino for TACKY!). Score: 4.9

Feathered Messes:

Guadeloupe and El Salvador

Miss Guadeloupe Brigitte Golabkhan (left): is so beautiful I can't even breathe. However, she chooses to wear this black and magenta satin and feathered concoction of a gown to the Miss World "World Fashion Designer Award" Competition last week, and well, her beauty stock for me, just went down. Score: 5.2

Miss El Salvador Maria Luisa Vicuna (right): Too much lace, too many feathers, and then the mermaid shape. She was trying for a Beyonce-at-the-Met and well, she achieved a gown in a San Salvador Drag Show. Score: 5.0

The Bahamas and Ukraine

Miss Bahamas Daronique Young (left): I give her points for the "I'm a Mermaid Princess" look. She does look kinda HOT in this two piece ensemble. But, isn't this more of a costume than an evening gown? How many peacocks did it take to make this gown? Score: 6.0

Miss Ukraine Karina Zhyronkina (right): Let me begin by saying that she is STUNNING! She should either win Miss World 2012 or at least be on the Final podium (it's like the Pageant Olympics!). But this gown. There's something both beautiful (the sequin detail looks expensive and I like the black and blue color combination) but...the feather applique and side cut-outs on the torso, it all adds to a dress one would see atop a Gay Pride float. Score: 7.0

Rosette Queens: Indonesia and Uganda

Miss Indonesia Ines Putri Tjiptadi Chandra: If this gown was placed in front of Michael Kors on Project Runway, he'd say she looked like she was POOPING feathered rosettes. Score: 4.8

Miss Uganda Phiona Bissu:  Awww, bless her little heart. Miss Uganda's gown reminds me of those dresses that are made entirely of toilet paper... I really wish there was something more I could say. Score: 4.5

National Costume Awards:

Miss Kenya Shamim Nabil: OK, maybe I am confused. I know that the Miss World "World Fashion Designer Award" is about highlighting the fashion design talent of the contestant's nations. So...is this also the National Parade of Nations Costume Parade? Can it be too redundant for a "Miss Kenya" to be wearing animal print safari as an evening gown? I think even the safari tourists would run away from this. Score: 5.0

Miss Cote d'Ivoire Helene-Valerie Djouka: Because she looks so darn cute, I am giving her points. Otherwise, on any one else, this still would be a pseudo-costume mess of an orange dress. And is that an iridescent poly organza overlay?? NOOOO!!!! Score: 6.4

And My Favorite of the Group:

Miss Mongolia Bayaarma Huselbaatar: I don't even know where to begin with this one. But I'll try. Bayaarma gets MAJAH "Nick Points" in the "Bringing Out Your Inner Drag Queen" part of working a runway catwalk. This gown/costume is rather FAB in a kooky way. The headdress is very John Galliano for Dior "Tutankhamen" Collection from back in the day.  
For ALL of this, I give her my Score of 8.0. It's a MESS but a mess that makes a gay man smile.

Beauty Pageant Minute: Miss USA 2012 Evening Gown Portraits--My Favorites of the Bunch!

Pageant Betty Good:

Miss California USA Natalie Pack: Former contestant on "America's Next Top Model" reality show, Natalie Pack is "one to watch" since HELLO, she actually IS a Model (as opposed to how some girls put that down as their job, but we all know better). Anyhow, she chose this peach-colored satin strapless draped gown which I think suited her very well. Loved the side-swept Rita Hayworth hair and those big ol' crystal-encrusted earrings. Those pumps are a bit questionable, but I forgive her.

The 61st Annual Miss USA pageant is happening as I type...the Preliminaries were tonight and Sunday, June 3rd is the Final Telecast LIVE from Planet Hollywood Resort and Casino in Las Vegas, Nevada. The 51 contestants--50 US States plus District of Columbia, of course--have been in the "Sin City" for several weeks now for rehearsals, appearances, swimsuit fashion shows, and well, doing what beauty pageant girls do: looking flawless and trying not to sweat but rather "glisten" under the scorching Vegas sun.

Last week, the Miss Universe Organization released the "Evening Gown" Portraits on the Miss USA Website. Many pageant insiders know that for the most part, these are NOT the gowns the girls will wear for the Preliminaries and/or Final Telecast competition, but it's still fun to see what they chose and yes, to give my "Nick Two Cents". In my last post, I reviewed the "Plunging Cha-Cha", High Slit and unfortunate "Armpit Pose" ladies, so now, here are my "I Likey" girls:

Canary Pretty:

Miss Michigan USA Kristen Samantha Danyal: looks very "Sofia Vergara Miami Exotic" in this strapless yellow gown with cowl draped side, gathered midriff, full skirt and sequined detail. She's very "Miss Colombia" in this. Yes, there's A LOT going on, but somehow--for me--it works. It's all helped by the fact that she wisely let her hair go simple and non-Pageant Pouf-ed. Her "Oh Yes, I'd love a Mojito..." and "Oh Is That Your Beautiful Wife?" pose is FABULOSO!

Miss Ohio USA Audrey Bolte: Miss Audrey looks like a WINNER--stunning, perfect Barbie Blond, statuesque (5'10"). Hope she knows where Iran and Syria are and who Sarkozy lost the French Presidential elections to (Final Question suggestions!!), 'cause if she also comes out looking somewhat intelligent, she might get the crown. This is the gown she chose (or was given to her, who knows!), for the Miss USA 2012 Website Evening Gown Portraits. Canary yellow, heavy satin fitted gown, with a gathered over-skirt. Is it very late 80's/early 90's? Yes, but on Audrey it looks regal and Red Carpet-ready. I can see her at Cannes...like yesterday! I'm really liking her and this gown--it might be the lack of a HOOCHIE plunging neckline and TOO-high slit, and too-stacked heel showing.

Miss Oklahoma USA Lauren Taylor Lundeen: The emerald green chiffon shirred gown with one-shoulder sequin applique trim looks great on Lauren, Miss Oklahoma USA. This is a typical "Go-To" Pageant Gown style that EVERY pageant-and-Prom clothing manufacturer has in their Look Book. And for good reason--because it works. The "swishing" pose and modern flat with bangs hairstyle makes it look fresh and (somewhat) modern.

Miss Missouri USA Katie Kearney:  I think this is a very sexy gown but without the too-high slit and too-low plunging neckline. The sequined nude fabrication--along with the multicolored chiffon godet pieces--add a bit of drama and "Hollywood Starlet" allure. Is it a bit "Dancing With The Stars"? Yep. But, I LIKE it! It also fits her OH-MY-GOD-SHE'S-SO-SKINNY body perfectly.

Miss Alabama USA Katherine Webb: OK, let's just begin with "HUNEY YOU ARE GORGEOUS!!" That hair, the eyes, the look. She should be "Miss Venezuela"! I know she's from the "South" but she looks like she should be from "SOUTH AMERICA"! I like the gown except I just feel it did not need the slit. But I "get it" since she was so "covered up" with the high neck and drop shoulder cap sleeves...The torso is VERY "Figure Skating 101" but if you know just a little about me...you also might realize, I kinda like that.

Finally...

Miss Rhode Island USA Olivia Culpo: The color on this Empire-waist style gown is exquisite. It's Grecian, it's Pageant, it's Haute Prom, and it's got the subtle crystal trim detail to add just enough bedazzle! And need I add, I am LOVING the "I'm just walking by and Oh, is that a Photographer??!!" pose.

It will be interesting to see what gowns these girls actually chose to wear to tonight's Miss USA 2012 very important Preliminary Competition--where the Top Semi Finalists are chosen for Sunday night's Final Telecast. I'll have my "Best" and "Oh No She Didn't" of the Miss USA 2012 Preliminaries soon..Stay Tuned Pageant Kids!

Beauty Pageant Minute: Miss Belarus 2012

Belarus Queen...

All Smiles: Yulia Stankovich, the new "Miss Belarus 2012" for "Miss World 2012"

On May 4th--last week--a new Belarus Queen was crowned--Miss Belarus 2012---and the winner was brunette,  20-year old Yulia Skalkovich. Yulia is from Brest, stands 178 cm (5' 10") tall and will now be representing her country at the Miss World 2012 in Inner Mongolia China (unless naked photos of her are found, or it is discovered that she is married a la Miss Dominican Republic 2012).

Crowned: The new "Miss Belarus 2012" Yulia Stalkovich (left) being crowned

The "Miss Belarus" pageant takes place--unusually enough--every two years. I guess within those two years, they use up those girls throughout various 2012 and 2013 international beauty pageants. That's my only reasoning for this--or it's too expensive to hold the contest every year. I'm sure it's not for a lack of beautiful girls. From the pics, they seem to have plenty.

Accessorized: Yulia Stalkovich "Miss Belarus 2012", during one of the costume/fashion segments of the pageant

During the evening festivities, Yulia also won the "Miss Photo" title, recognized as the most photogenic of all the contestants. Her prize award for winning "Miss Belarus 2012" was equivalent to a little over $6,000.  It might not seem like a lot (in terms of an international pageant prize money award) but maybe in Belarus it's like winning the Belarus Lottery!

The new "Miss Belarus 2012", Yulia Stalkovich (center) and her two runner up's

28 girls from different regions of Belarus participated in the contest. First Runner-Up and "Miss Sports" was 20-year-old Victoria Shavel from Homel, and the the Second Runner-Up was 21-year-old Anastasia Pogranichnaya. In case you are geographically-challenged, Belarus is a landlocked nation in Eastern Europe and a former Soviet republic. It's neighbors are Russia, Ukraine, Poland, Latvia and Lithuania.

Now, let's discuss the FASHION: The pageant had LOTS of Fashion segments in which contestants showed their best in High-end Gowns, what looked like Prom-like Gowns, quirky casual wear, and well even-quirkier "fashion wear". Take a look at these looks form the eventual winner, Yulia wore throughout the night:

Yulia Stalkovich "Miss Belarus 2012" during the pageant in different fashions--from gowns...to funky "daywear"

The contestants also had to don a "Belarus Fantasy" ensemble at one point, which had them all in high-low over-skirts, too-short mini dresses, head jewelry, and for some reason, lots of shoulder ruffling and tulle detail that was waaayyyy to 1998 for my taste:

Belarus Exotic: Contestants during one of the costume-change portions of the "Miss Belarus 2012" pageant

Speaking of 1998...Let's go even further to 1986--The Final Evening Gowns:

It was Disney Princess Heaven: Where's Mickey Mouse and will he be wearing a Boutonniere?

Check out a couple of these strapless fitted bustier-and-full gathered skirt dresses from a couple of the contestants:

I don't even know where to begin in terms of commenting on these. I feel as if I've been put in a time traveling machine and transported back to 1986 and I am at my high school prom! I want this to STOP!!! The whole pageant-girls-wearing-1986-Prom-gowns thang. It's tired, dated and oh so not fashion-forward. If any of these women wore these to a black-tie red carpet event, there would be a big "X" on them. I'm sure these girls had no choice so I am not judging them. But please, pageant organizers and pageant stylists...get it together!!! And show something more 2012, and NOT 1986.

 

Other than that--Congratulations to the newly crowned "Miss Belarus 2012" (above). You're gorgeous darling. Just don't wear a 1986-type gown to the "Miss World 2012" Finals. How do you say "pretty please?" in Belarusian and Russian??

Beauty Pageant Minute: Miss Equatorial Guinea 2012

  
A New African Queen...

Gorgeous in Purple: Jennifer Riveiro Ilende, Miss Belleza Guinea Ecuatorial 2012 (Miss Equatorial Guinea)

Last week, on April 27th, the tall and very beautiful Jennifer Riveiro Ilende was crowned Miss Belleza Guinea Ecuatorial 2012 (Miss Equatorial Guinea) at the Sipopo International Conference Centre in Malabo.

Jennifer made it into the "Pageant Record Books" as she will be the first ever representative of that African nation to compete in the 62nd edition of the Miss World pageant, which will take place on August 18, 2012 in Dongsheng Fitness Center Stadium, Ordos, Inner Mongolia, China (yes, not Miami, not Sao Paulo, not London...nope...INNER MONGOLIA!!!)

Crowning Moment: Jennifer Riveiro Ilende gets her "Miss Belleza Guine Ecuatorial 2012" crown

In the event that you may be "Geographically-challenged", Equatorial Guinea is located in Middle Africa. The independent nation is made up of two parts--a section in the continent and another section made up of islands offshore, one of which contains its capital city, Malabo. It is one of the smallest countries in continental Africa and also one of the richest per capita. But of course, it is no surprise that the wealth is very unevenly distributed. It is also THE ONLY nation in Africa that has Spanish as one of its official languages (French and Portuguese are the others).

Now, onto the pageant and the winner. The pageant is organized and run by Agencia Mogue, a model agency in Equatorial Guinea, with the help of Constancia Mangue de Obiang, first lady of the nation.

La Mas Bella: The new "Miss Belleza Guinea Ecuatorial 2012" Jennifer Riveiro Ilende is 21 years old, 1.80m tall (about 5' 11" tall) and is a model. She could do well in August at the Miss World 2012 pageant. Now, onto the GOWNS:

The gowns were FABULOUS, chic and  modern. Take a look tat the three Finalists above. At least with these three: not ONE tacky, bedazzled, too-high slit mess in sight! The winner (middle), wore a purple-colored chiffon gown with gathered bust and one-shoulder satin strap detail; clean, elegant and oh-so-right. Her "Damas" (Runners-Up) look resplendent as well. The one on the left, looks THE DEFINITION of CHIC in her red gathered-halter neckline gown and the one on the left, looks VERY Spring/Summer 2013, in her lilac-and-purple watercolor flower-print gown.  How could a tiny African nation pageant get it SO right? Is it because a modeling agency is running the pageant? Is their "Official Stylist" ON IT, when it comes to what Beauty Pageant contestants should be wearing in 2012, and is referencing Fashion Magazines, the International Red Carpet, and not "Toddlers & Tiaras"? Whatever it is, they are YEARS ahead of some of these much bigger international pageants and what their pageant girls are wearing:

Miss COOCHIE SLITS:

Yes, You Might See My Underwear: "Nuestra Belleza El Salvador/ Miss El Salvador Universe 2012" Ana Yancy Clavel (left) and "Miss El Salvador World 2012" Maria Luisa Vicuna

Oooh Huney, That is a HIGH Slit: "Miss Brasil World 2012" finalist (left photo, on the right) Camilla Serakides and "Miss Slovak Republic Universe 2012" Lubica Stepanova (right photo)--These two ladies were ill-advised for sure. There are elements which are good in each of these gowns, however, the TOO HIGH slits, negates any of those good elements and deems the ladies--and their gowns--two minutes away from a stripper pole.

 Pageant Betty's:

Miss Dominican Republic Universe 2012 Pageant: Above are the Finalist in this year's pageant--and their bedazzled, be-organza'ed, be-high slit'ed gowns...If someone went back in time to well, 1992--I would NOT be surprised to see this photo--and more importantly--these same gowns!

 Miss Binibining Pilipinas Miss Philippines Universe 2012 Pageant: See comment above.

Uh NO: Let's just hope that NO ONE follows the fashion advice of this pretty woman, Fernanda Semino, and what she wore--and head-scratchingly won in!--at last year's "Miss Uruguay Universe 2011" pageant. Sequined Applique Halter and iridescent POLY organza. Enough Said.